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I am sorry . . . “The Light-Bearer Series” by Emily Guido

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“I am sorry Charmeine, for so many things it is hard to express them all . . . but, I am going to try.” He took a big breath and looked in her eyes. “I am sorry for not supporting you. I am sorry for not believing in you. I am sorry for not having faith in you. I am sorry, Charmeine. If you let me show you, for the rest of my life until the end of time, I will never doubt you again.”

“Tabbruis, I can’t do this now.”

“Please let me finish?” He gently held her chin, looked into her eyes and declared, “Charmeine you are my life. You are my light. If you go back to Long Island . . .”

She walked to the terrace stone wall. “Tabbruis, it isn’t so easy putting Jack and Jill back together again. I really need to be alone.”

He walked to her and said, “Look at me this time, Charmeine. I have to say my peace, and I will leave.”

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She turned and faced him with her hands defiantly across her chest and sighed.

“If you go back to Long Island, I will accept it, but let me go and be near you. Let me live near you. I can buy any kind of house or apartment you wish for your own privacy. You do not need to see me, just let me be near you, for you are the center of my Earth. God knows I cannot live without being near you. You never have to lay your eyes on me. I just need to be near you. That is what I ask. Nevertheless, please forgive me, Charmeine. Forgive me enough to let me just be near you. If you abandon me, I will not survive. Wherever you go, I will go with you.  Whatever you want, I will give it to you.” 

He unfolded her arms and took her hands which sparked. He unclenched her fists and drew them up in front of them, palm to palm. Her sparks began to go up and down their bodies, enveloping them with light.

“Tabbruis, do you remember the first time this happened? You were trying to convince me not to leave and sacrifice myself to the Elder Council.”

“Yes, I remember, my love.” He drew nearer to her. “I know you cannot lie to me, do you have the strength to be without me either?”

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“How long have you been working on that speech Tabbruis?”

He nodded with a slight smile and said, “Well, I have to admit, I have been rehearsing it ever since we left Smith Point Beach.”

“You are not lying… I thought so,” and she chuckled.

Then his eyes became like pools of tears. “I am so afraid of what you are going to say, my heart feels like it has been incased in ice and cannot beat.”

She broke free from his hands and their circle of light was gone. She faced the Black Sea holding onto the stone wall, and breathed deeply. Not looking at him, she said, “Tabbruis let me say although I was heartbroken you did not have faith, trust and belief in me, I know you are truly sorry which has healed my heart.”

Tabbruis started to reach for her, but she held up her hands willing him to keep his place.

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Keeping her face to the sea, she said, “Reconciliation . . . seems like such a passé word but it’s really love. God knows I have so much love in my heart for you I cannot bear to be away from you also. I knew you came into my room and watched me sleep after I came back from Long Island. I could feel your presence, and then, I could sleep. One night, I was crying myself to sleep. You came over to the bed and held me. I wanted you so badly, but it was my foolishness. I am at fault here also. I should have forgiven you because God knows I love you Tabbruis. I see now we can’t be apart, because we are one.”

She turned to look at him. “Looking into your eyes, Tabbruis, my love, I can see eternity. It was over before it begun, our destinies are one, like it has been since God made us for each other in Heaven.”

With relief, joy and love, Tabbruis embraced Charmeine.  Ever so slowly and gently, he bent to kiss her soft lips. He caressed her body in his strong arms.

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This is one of my MOST favorite passages

in “The Light-Bearer Series”

because in the final analysis,

LOVE is what it all comes down to.

Lots of love, 

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This is one of my FAVORITE songs

Sung by one of my FAVORITE singer/songwriters

It brings a tear to my eye today….

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